I was on the checkout line at the supermarket and a son was helping his mom unload the groceries from their cart and put them on the conveyor belt.

He was putting the soda bottles on their sides on the belt and the unruly bottles were rolling every which way. The Mom didn’t criticize him for his inexperience or bark a command at him.

Instead of -

“That’s stupid! Don’t lay the bottles on their sides!”

The mom simply provided information in a very neutral tone of voice.

“The bottles will take up less space if you stand them up.”

The son saw the wisdom in the new information provided to him and immediately up righted the bottles.

A simple shift in our languaging, such as providing information can lead to more cooperation. This Mom showed respect and appreciation by simply providing information. The son, in turn, felt valued and capable and cooperative.

Thanks Checkout-Mom!